curiousconfusedpoly:

hauntedtelepone:

dramaticmari:

superluminalflower:

polyamory is neither inherently abusive or radical it’s literally just dating multiple people at once. this has pros and cons and risk factors specific to it just like monogamy does. that’s it. not that deep, no need to apply all sorts of symbolism to it

@hauntedtelepone

It’s not radical in the sense that “everyone should do this to change the world”. It is radical in that it challenges something so ingrained in society that hardly anyone sees how problematic it is. Monogamy is default. Monogany is glorified. Non-monogamy is vilified and choosing it marks us. In that sense it isn’t “just dating multiple people”. When you date one person you have endless models and support and you can turn to nearly anyone and talk about hardships and ask for advice. A person choosing non-monogamy has a relationship that is automatically viewed as bad. If I go to councelling with one partner, I need to hide the other. Otherwise the other partner’s existence is viewed as a symptom of a bad relationship. When my father heard about my girlfriend, his response was “I hope you get well soon”. He literally sees this as a sickness.

Polyamory isn’t better or worse than monogamy.

But it is more difficult. Not inherently. But because you’re choosing a path less people walk and you’re choosing struggles you hardly see resolved and you need to reimagine your relationship and build it without a model.

Non-monogamy shouldn’t be radical. But when you challenge something so rooted in the way society works and thinks, I think it is.

I’m reblogging this again because it’s so profound