grantaires:

hello students welcome to les mis university and more importantly: e/r theory au application 101 aka How E/R Works In An AU Setting

i, professor dan p gigs, will be your instructor

so heres whats what with my deal with e/r ok i get freakin BUGGED when i see people write total complete 100% flat out requited e/r because quite honestly that is impossible and illogical

just imagine you are enjolras and there’s this guy just following you around all the time wanting to touch your butt and you dont really agree with him on a lot of things and hes really annoying and gosh sometimes you just have to blow your freaking top because it gets so annoying and

okay do you really think you can have 100% requited feelings for someone like that

ive thought long and hard about this and no the answer is no

you see e/r isnt like that ok if you want that then there’s marius/cosette you can go read some of that somewhere else

e/r isnt requited and e/r isnt normal and e/r is FUNCTIONAL its highly dysfunctional and its a mess and its something you look at and you just go

oh dear oh dear

and thats kind of how enjolras feels about grantaire i guess

theres a lot of head shaking involved with e/r and enjolras does all of it and well a lot of what grantaire does warrants gratuitous head shaking and judging because grantaire is a freaking mess

there is just so much freaking desperation on his part and omg its so sad it makes me want to cry because wow give the guy a break except it is all his fault i mean hes not really being the best that he could be and mAYBE

enjolras wants him to be the best that he could be (heck enjolras wants everyone to be the best that they can be and he expects them to do so) and maybe he pities him an awful lot and well come on who DOESNT pity grantaire hes really rather pitiful

so yeah its just awful amounts of pity and maybe they were pals once and grantaire just vaguely spiralled downwards and started doing things enjolras didnt agree with and maybe enjolras feels responsible for that and maybe enjolras is nice sometimes and its a horrible pattern of positive reinforcement and gosh grantaire is just a freaking puppy who needs to be loved ok please lOVE HIM except he pees on the carpet a lot and enjolras doesnt like him because of that

so yeah i kind of forgot where i was going with this but basically e/r cant work as 2 + 2 = 4

e/r is more like

and its really complicated and its really unhealthy but its really

great

ok

yitzhaks:

i think about this a loT ACTUALLY

see, he wakes up and he can smell it before anything else. that terrible thick iron scent filling his nose and mouth, and he knows exactly what has happened, and god, the last thing in the world that he wants to do is open his eyes, but he does anyways, because he knows that he has no other choice. 

and he sees his friends — just a couple, those who managed to get into the cafe — broken on the floor, crimson-soaked, and it’s more blood than he’s ever seen at once before, and the same grey dizziness as always begins to swarm through his skull, now matched by a plummeting sickness in his stomach, because he can see joly and combeferre and courfeyrac’s faces, and he knows that they aren’t breathing. 

and he could give up there — he could let himself fall beside them; he’s far gone enough that he knows he wouldn’t feel the impact of hitting the ground. but instead, trembling, he looks up. 

and across the room is enjolras, and he is untouched — red, as always, but not with blood. his eyes are bright and steady as they meet grantaire’s, and they pierce him, right through his head and his heart, electrifying him with just enough silver lightening to hold the faintness at bay, to bring him to his feet, even. 

and of course he’s shaking as he crosses the room, but he holds onto the brightness of consciousness, and he knows that he won’t have to force himself for too long, anyways. 

he says something. something like i am one of them, or they are mine, or i am theirs. his lips are numb; he can barely feel the words upon them.

he reaches enjolras’s side and scarcely manages to get out a desperate request before enjolras’s fingers are twining with his, holding him steady, filling his tingling cold skin with a strong, gentle warmth. 

he sees enjolras begin to smile. he knows he’s done enough, and the dizziness is closing in on him. 

his knees start to buckle, then, and the bullet pierces him before he can hit the ground. 

he doesn’t feel the pain.