not all people who identify as bisexual are fixated on traditional notions of gender, so maybe everyone should stop saying bisexuality excludes trans and nonbinary people, ‘cause it’s getting annoying.
you can be bisexual and nonbinary.
you can be bisexual and be attracted to nonbinary people and it won’t make you less bisexual.
not everyone define the word bisexual as “attracted to men and women”, especially not everyone use “both genders”, since there’s a lot of genders besides men and women.
yes, the definition of bisexual today is very similar to pansexual and some people even use both labels for themselves at once.
implying you know more about a bi person’s experience than they do is really rude and pointless, if a person says they’re bi, they’re bi.
it isn’t hard to respect bi people and their experiences.
So much of the Euro-American understanding of being trans (or anything other than 100% constantly identified with your assigned gender) focuses on discomfort.
Some people take this idea to an extreme and claim you can’t be trans unless you hate your body and want every surgery available to you. As many other writers have said before, that’s not true. It’s perfectly possible to be trans with only mild dysphoria or none at all. It’s perfectly possible to be trans and have a mental map of your body that looks just like the one you already have.
But I’d like to push even harder against the idea that trans=discomfort. I’d like to offer this: sometimes the exploration of one’s gender can be motivated by pleasure rather than discomfort.
Let me give an example. Let’s say there’s a person named Cal. Most people think of Cal as a boy, and Cal’s all right with that. So far as Cal’s concerned, a boy isn’t a bad thing to be. But sometimes, Cal likes to imagine being a girl and being treated as a girl. Those fantasies are always accompanied by feelings of pleasure, satisfaction, anticipation, and warmth. Eventually, having had these thoughts for years, Cal asks people to use ‘she’ pronouns in private and to refer to her as a girl. Cal does this for another year before claiming the label “trans”.
Some people would say a person like Cal can’t be trans because there’s no dysphoria, self-hatred, distress, or even discomfort. There’s just a pleasure-based preference. But why is distress necessary? Why are trans people supposed to be defined solely by our pain and self-hatred?
It’s my opinion that defining trans people solely by discomfort is an aspect of transphobia. The idea behind trans=discomfort is that being anything other than 100% cis is so awful that no one would do it unless the alternative were unlivable. Think about that: defining trans people solely by their experiences of discomfort means believing that being trans is so awful that only misery could drive us to it. And to me, that sounds like the thinking of someone who really hates trans people.
So I’ll come out and say it: sometimes transition or self-exploration of gender is not just about lessening discomfort, but is about improving and deepening the pleasure we take in our lives.
“Think about that: defining trans people solely by their experiences of discomfort means believing that being trans is so awful that only misery could drive us to it.”
what if we started using yellow roses as a symbol of aro people’s love
its not uncommon to associate types of romance with flowers (sapphic violets) and yellow roses are commonly known to represent friendship
the more i think about this the more i like it
also yellow is sometimes associated with aromanticism because of older versions of the flag. so we can say that yellow being used in aromantic imagery represents yellow roses
also like totally not excited for the oncoming “boys can wear makeup and not be gay” garbage just as we had to experience “girls can have shaved heads and wear flannel and not be lesbians” like who gives a fuck if someone assumes you’re gay like its the worst fucking offense in history lmao
Also, people look gay on purpose so other gay people can find them. Straight girls were jealous of our practical, comfortable AND sexy style, so they stole it, called it “boyfriend” and now they get super pissy because some unaware girl lesbian-nodded at them.
If you choose to dress in stuff traditionally associated with gay people and a gay person mistakes you for one of us, that’s on you, and you don’t get to feel offended. You are the fucker who’s jamming our gaydar on purpose. Suck it up.
Straight people stole our culture and fashion and also got all the credit for it lol
Gay people : come up with ways for us to notice each other in public
Straight people, trying to copy that look: wow why do all these girls/boys keep trying to hit on me im not some h*m*
So I work in a pub and during tonight’s quiz, one of the questions was “What does LGBTQ stand for?”
Now the teams were mostly made up of older straight couples so not many people got it right. I did however find this gem when collecting up the answer sheets:
support aromantic allosexuals who are part of a marginalized group that’s hypersexualized by others.
being aroallo doesn’t mean that the hypersexualization you face is your fault or that you deserve it, it doesn’t mean you deserve to be abused or fetishized, it doesn’t mean that you’re “setting a bad example” for that group, and it doesn’t mean you deserve to be treated as anything less than human. being aroallo does not mean you’re not deserving of respect, kindness, and basic human decency or that you’re not allowed to have boundaries and have them respected.
¯_( ಠ_ಠ)_/¯ 