nonbinaryjoanofarc:

honestly hamlet 1.2 should always be set at a dinner table because it is the entire Family Dinner Experience right there. you have the annoying nosy relatives, you have the crushing parental disapproval, you have yourself unfavorably compared with others of your age, it’s the whole package 

Les Miserables Shakespeare version (not iambic pentameter)

enjandrtrash:

thorneofacre:

enjandrtrash:

So a couple years ago, I had to rewrite a few scenes from a book in Shakespeare style, but without iambic pentameter because my teacher was kind, and obviously I chose Les Mis.

I hope you enjoy it for Barricade Day!!

Act I Scene I
Darkness Surrounds Grantaire
A street behind a barricade

ENJOLRAS: Grantaire, go sleep away the wine that cloudeth thy mind. Tis a place for intoxication, not drunkenness. Dishonour the barricade not.

GRANTAIRE: Thy speech alone is enough to chase away the clouds inside my mind. Thou must know I believe in thee.

ENJOLRAS: Leave me.
Grantaire: I prithee, grant thy servant permission to sleep ‘t off here.

ENJOLRAS: Nay, sleep it off elsewhere, winecask!

GRANTAIRE: Let me sleep here and if need be die here.

ENJOLRAS: Thou art incapable of believing or thinking or willing or living or dying.

GRANTAIRE: Thou shalt see, my lord, thou shalt see.

[exit Enjolras]

If I could only see as he sees – my golden god of the sun!
He seeth a light
doth command it to come through the dark abyss of truth.
He is mad and yet I love him more dearly than mine own life,
indeed, he brings life to me.
Enjolras, Enjolras, my lord, my devotion! None loves the daylight more than the blind man and for me he is that – an eagle soaring in the upper air of faith whilst I, poor lost soul, earthbound must be.
Invaluable is he to me, but I to him?
Nay! He wouldst sooner sleep with harlots than allow me to press mine unworthy hand with his.
I am an unwelcome Ephestion, torn away from that which gives me strength as I possess none.
Cruel fates! If I could only die in his light, I could die a happy man!
For what is man? Man liveth and dieth and tis all for not.
Enjolras, thou art leading away thy children – thy disciples – to a bloody death, but willingly will they go if thou sayest tis for freedom.
Well I would go for thee, blond youth, not for some false dream, nay, I would go for thee if thou desired it.
For thee would I be damned to hell if only I could watch thy flight. Alas, I am nothing and as nothing I must die and live alone.
[Exit]

Act I scene II
[Enter Gavroche, Enjolras, Combeferre, and workmen]

GAVROCHE: Come now, we must have more paving-stones, more barrels, more of everything. Come, a basket of rubble to stuff up the hole. Tis not big enough to provide protection from the blades and blows of war. Shove everything upon it, break up the dwelling if necessary. Hullo, there lieth a glass-paned door!

WORKMAN 1: Then what shall we do with’t, clumsy young lad?

GAVROCHE: Clumsy yourself. A glass-paned door is a very good thing t’have on a barricade – easy to attack, but not so easy to get past. Have not ye attempted to steal apples o’er a wall with broken glass on top? Think of a bit of glass cutting the soldiers’ arms. Tis the trouble – no imagination doth ye posses! A sword! I must have a sword! Why will no one give one to me?

COMBEFERRE: A sword at thine age?

GAVROCHE: Why not pray tell? I had one in the last revolution when we forced Charles X to flee from us!

ENJOLRAS: Once there are enough for the men, we shall begin to deliver them out to the children.

GAVROCHE: If thou shalt expire afore me I shall take thy sword.

ENJOLRAS: Urchin!

GAVROCHE: Greenhorn!
[enter Young Man 1]
Ho – come to join us? Art thou not willing to do a turn for thy poor old country?
[Young Man runs]

ENJOLRAS: Gavroche, ye art small enough that thou shalt not be noticed. Slip out along the house fronts, out into the streets, and bring thee back to tell what’s going on.

GAVROCHE: So we are good for something after all, us little ‘uns. Aye, I will do ‘t. Ye trust the little ‘uns, my lord, but keep an eye on the big ‘uns – see, that man there.

ENJOLRAS: What of him?

GAVROCHE: Tis a spy.

ENJOLRAS: Art thou certain?

GAVROCHE: Aye, he took me less than a fortnight ago by the Pont Royal.

ENJOLRAS: Who art thou?

JAVERT: I see what thou meanest by it. Yes, I am.

ENJOLRAS: Thou art an informer?

JAVERT: I am a representative of the law.

ENJOLRAS: And thy name?

JAVERT: Javert.

GAVROCHE: So the mouse has caught the cat!

ENJOLRAS: Tis a spy – ye shall be killed two minutes before the barricade falls.

JAVERT: Why not now?

ENJOLRAS: I shall not waste our strength.

JAVERT: A flick of a knife would take little effort.

ENJOLRAS: We art judges, not murderers. Gavroche – get started. Do what I told thee.

GAVROCHE: I am gone, but let me have his sword. I have left you the musician, but I would like to have his harp.
[exit Gavroche]

LE CABUC: Comrades, that house would be a good place to shoot from. With marksmen at all the windows, devil a soul could come along the street!

YOUNG MAN 2: But the house is shut.

LE CABUC: Canst we knock?

YONG MAN 3: They shant open.

LE CABUC: Then we shall break down the door. Is anyone in? Silence.

DOORKEEPER: Messieurs, what do you want?

LE CABUC: Open the door!

DOORKEEPER: Nay, I am forbidden, monsieur.

LE CABUC: Do it all the same.

DOORKEEPER: I canst do as ye request.

LE CABUC: Wilt thou open?

DOORKEEPER: Nay

LE CABUC: Then ye refuse?

DOORKEEPER: Aye, for mine own –
[Doorkeeper shot by an arrow and dies]

LE CABUC: There!

ENJOLRAS: On thy knees. On thy knees.

LE CABUC: Though thou art a youth, I have no strength to resist thee.

ENJOLRAS: Pray or pounder. Thou hast one minute.

LE CABUC: Mercy!

[Enjolras stabs Le Cabuc. Le Cabuc falls dead]

ENJOLRAS: Get rid of that.

[Exit Young men carrying Le Cabuc]

Shiit this is some dedicated work

Thank you!! It was a lot of fun! I originally did a scene with Joly, Bossuet, and Grantaire too, but I think I’ve lost it since 😦

reasons why hamlet is actually gay and why he and horatio are together

enjolryas:

Despite what the majority of the public is taught, queer people have existed throughout all of history. From ancient to present times, their lives and—more often than not—hardships have been documented and illustrated in pieces of entertainment. During the late Renaissance, Shakespeare produced Hamlet  (1605), one of these such pieces.  Hamlet, taking place in 15th century Denmark, follows the story of Prince Hamlet, who learns news that his father has been killed by his uncle, the newly-crowned King Claudius. As Hamlet grapples with his responsibility to avenge his father, his only confidante and source of trust is his best friend, Horatio. Although one may not perceive with the naked eye any hints of queer representation in  Hamlet, a closer look at the play reveals how Shakespeare used Renaissance-era stereotypes of queer men as a means of indicating characters’ sexualities. Not only is Hamlet gay, but the nature of Hamlet and Horatio’s relationship indicates that their bond is one of romantic intimacy, which presents itself in their interactions together.

Hamlet’s femininity, which is demonstrated by his over-emotional—if not outright melodramatic—demeanor, hints at Renaissance-era queer-coding. When the royal family is first introduced, Claudius comments on the “unmanly grief” Hamlet has for his late father (I.ii.94). Customs would dictate that Gertrude, being a widowed woman, would be the one mourning for the longest period of time, but Hamlet wears his emotions on his sleeve and reverses traditional family roles. While Gertrude is indifferent and gracious, Hamlet is morose and temperamental. His sensitivity reflects stereotypical feminine traits. Later, before the players’ performance begins, Hamlet personifies his soul as a mistress and says that she has chosen Horatio as her closest companion. By defining his psyche as feminine, Hamlet is violating societal standards masculinity. Feminine men are—as biased groups have believed throughout history—stereotypically queer, and as thus, Shakespeare is laying the foundation for a queer-coded male character.

Shakespeare further alludes to Hamlet’s homosexuality through jest. When Hamlet is comparing mankind to angels and gods, he says that despite mankind’s excellence, mankind does not delight him because humans do not matter. Rosencrantz laughs at the phrase “Man delights not me”, giving Hamlet’s words an unintentional double-meaning and insinuating that the opposite is true, that Hamlet has sexual relations with other men (II.ii.317). Although the laughter, as Rosencrantz later states, stems from the prospect of male actors “delighting” Hamlet with a play, it is more likely that Rosencrantz is lying, considering Shakespeare’s tendency to never pass up an opportunity to make an inappropriate joke. The young men of  Hamlet are known to regularly make inappropriate jokes, as seen with Guildenstern’s pun about Fortune’s private parts and Horatio’s comment about rhyming “was” with “ass” (II.ii.237; III.ii.291). Rosencrantz is therefore likely doing the same. The use of jokes presents a way for Shakespeare to indicate that Hamlet isn’t heterosexual without outright stating so, given that it would not be socially acceptable to do so. Hamlet’s friends are aware of his attraction to men and are not afraid to imply that they are aware of this fact.

Although Hamlet is written as having a romantic relationship with Ophelia, the forms of address Hamlet uses to refer to different characters reveal that his true feelings are for Horatio. In modern English, “thou” pronouns are used to express intimacy or belittlement, while “you” pronouns are used to express formality. It would be expected that Hamlet would call Ophelia “thou”, at least in private when he does not have to worry about social formalities. However, Hamlet only calls Ophelia “you”, except when he uses the belittling form of“thou” to disparage her about her virginity. Hamlet’s lack of affectionate words reveals that his feelings for Ophelia do not run as deep as true romantic intimacy would prescribe. In contrast, Hamlet uses the affectionate form of “thou” while speaking to Horatio in private, such as before the players perform and after Ophelia’s funeral. Hamlet is only willing to express his affection for Horatio when they are alone as if trying to keep his love for him hidden; it would be dangerous to refer to Horatio in an intimate manner in public, lest the court starts to suspect something between them. Furthermore, because Hamlet and Horatio are the only two non-familial people to exchange affectionate forms of “thou”—even Rosencrantz and Guildenstern, Hamlet’s other friends, are not referred to in such a fond fashion—their bond is more profound than  Hamlet ’s canon romantic pairings. On account of these forms of address, it is evident that Hamlet considers his relationship with Horatio more intimate than his relationship with his own girlfriend.

Hamlet’s feelings for Horatio are further confirmed by the manner in which he behaves around Horatio. Although Hamlet has written multiple love letters to Ophelia, during the time period of the play itself, he is never genuinely affectionate with her. He insults her, mocks her, and slut-shames her. Even after she has died and he proclaims his love for her, he seems to only say so in order to out-match Laertes’ love for Ophelia during their graveyard fight. It is well known that Hamlet is already “envenom[ed] with … envy” over Laertes’ fencing skills, so to rile Laertes up by trivializing his love for his dead sister would make Hamlet feel more powerful (IV.vii.103). Hamlet may care for Ophelia, but he is not in love with her. In contrast, Hamlet treats Horatio in a manner that can only be described as adoring. After complimenting Horatio on his level-headedness, Hamlet says:

Give me that man
That is not passion’s slave, and I will wear him In my heart’s core, ay, in my heart of heart,
As I do thee. (III.ii.73-76)

Not only is Hamlet referring to Horatio as “thee”, but he is also expressing a sentiment deep enough to be a romantic confession. Based on Hamlet’s words and actions, he is more intimate with Horatio than he is with Ophelia, his canon love interest. The deduction of such facts results in one conclusion: Hamlet is actually in love with Horatio.

Although Hamlet’s affection for Horatio is substantial, the reciprocated feelings Horatio has for Hamlet are even greater, as seen in the sacrifices Horatio is willing to make for him. Before the duel, Horatio tells Hamlet that he is willing to say Hamlet is not fit to fight. Prepared to lie to the court and throw his honor away, Horatio is ready to do anything to protect Hamlet and keep him safe. His devotion and attachment to Hamlet come together to form a deep affection, and while this alone is not enough to confirm any romantic feelings Horatio has for Hamlet, Horatio’s future actions are. While Hamlet is dying, Horatio attempts to commit suicide because he cannot bear to live a life without Hamlet. For Horatio to be so compelled to kill himself, his love for Hamlet must be one of no common rate, one that mere friendship cannot accurately define. In fact, Horatio’s suicide attempt in the face of Hamlet’s demise parallels the lovers’ deaths in Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet. Shakespeare, having produced  Romeo and Juliet before Hamlet, must have known what he was implying, perhaps with the hope that the audience would catch on as well. Since platonic fondness cannot explain Horatio’s devotion to Hamlet, romantic fondness must be the reasoning behind it.

Paired together, the evidence of a queer-coded Hamlet and the romantic undertones that Hamlet and Horatio share result in a play that calls attention to the struggles of same-sex romance during the Renaissance. Although it is true that the nature of men’s platonic relationships back then was allowed to be more affectionate than they are now, it cannot be ignored that Hamlet and Horatio’s love transcends the love of the play’s other, explicit romantic relationships. Although  Hamlet has always been a tragedy, examining Hamlet through a queer lens makes the play even more harrowing as two lovers, prohibited by society from expressing their feelings publicly, are ripped apart. 

me irl: the sonnets are queer, mercutio’s queer, iago wants to have sex with othello, puck and oberon are totally hooking up, emilia and desdemona are probably making out, are u fuckin kidding me with brutus/cassius rn, hamlet’s ace and doin queer shit w/horatio, phebe’s kinda gay for rosalind, nO ONE IS STRAIGHT
me in my term paper: well, the historical context is important for considering the hypothetical queerness of shakespeare’s characters, and we can’t ever really say anything for sure, but shakespeare’s ambiguous wording and use of complex scenarios that obscure gender open the texts to possibilities for queer readings maybe sometimes I don’t know

emeebee:

schmergo:

thoughtfulparadiseeagle:

schmergo:

When I walk into the mall and see Christmas decorations up the day after Halloween, I feel the same way Hamlet did when his mom married his annoying uncle so shortly after his father’s death.

C l a u d i u s .

His name’s never verbally spoken in the dialogue, only indicated in the stage directions, so I like to think Hamlet never actually learned his annoying uncle’s name and it’s wayyy too late to ask now

Santa Claudius.