assassinationtipsforladies:

barfyscorpion:

wildarcy:

i want to share with you some of my favourite graffiti from Pompeii

  • “Weep, you girls. My penis has given you up. Now it penetrates men’s behinds. Goodbye, wondrous femininity!“ 
  • “Amplicatus, I know that Icarus is buggering you. Salvius wrote this.“ 
  • “We two dear men, friends forever, were here. If you want to know our names, they are Gaius and Aulus.“
  • “Floronius, privileged soldier of the 7th legion, was here. The women did not know of his presence. Only six women came to know, too few for such a stallion.“
  • “On April 19th, I made bread.“
  • I have buggered men.“

  • “If anyone does not believe in Venus, they should gaze at my girlfriend.“
  • “It took 640 paces to walk back and forth between here and there ten times.“
  • “Chie, I hope your hemorrhoids rub together so much that they hurt worse than when they every have before!“
  • “Epaphra is not good at ball games.”
  • “Two friends were here.  While they were, they had bad service in every way from a guy named Epaphroditus.  They threw him out and spent 105 and half sestertii most agreeably on whores.“
  • “Secundus likes to screw boys.“

I’ve always loved these. Humanity has never fucking changed.

Tag urself, I’m ‘weep ye girls’

100hearteyes:

Actual names of some Portuguese towns/villages/municipalities

Hot daughter

Dead woman

Sad ugly woman

Eye of the ass alley

Just fall

Ass crack of bad luck

Leave the rest

Imaginary

Motherfucking river

Pig’s bed

Little blood

Rage

I liked it

Pigsties

Little dick’s lap

Dead ox

Chicken head

Pig’s butt

Cunt

Pussy valley

Thighs

Nose

Eye

Mouth

Crooked beard

Wooden leg

Biscuits

Asparagus

Crazy women

Women’s village

Eat little milk

Guardian angel

Hell

disposablebicycle:

disposablebicycle:

disposablebicycle:

disposablebicycle:

disposablebicycle:

disposablebicycle:

Freelancing in technical theater means you’re on a lot of different email lists. People need a crew, they send out an email, you respond with your availability. Now, most people start these with things like “hey folks” or “hi everyone”. Neal is not most people.

His openers started off innocent enough.

Then, he started to push boundaries.

And as you can see, it has spiraled out of control since then.

Tag yourselves. I’m the anteater in a suit who thinks he can pass.

THEY JUST KEEP COMING

He’s even witty in real time.