concept: a game called “john mulaney or cecil palmer?” where you have to guess if a quote was said by popular stand-up comedian john mulaney or fictional radio host cecil gershwin palmer
this might sound easy, but please keep in mind that john mulaney has
said “whoa, that tall child looks terrible! get some rest, tall child!
you can’t keep burning the candle at both ends!” and cecil palmer has
said “alligators: can they kill your children? yes.”Let’s go:
“There is a thin semantic line separating weird and beautiful, and that line is covered in jellyfish.”
“Guns don’t kill people. Blood loss and organ damage do.”
“I’ll keep all my emotions right here, and then one day I’ll die.”
“Something happened here. Hope it’s a miracle, but probably not.“
“We found a pool of the killer’s blood. Hm, gross! Mop it up!”
“Remember: if you see something, say nothing, and drink to forget.“
“It is one hundred percent easier not to do things than to do them.”
“And it is possible that I am alone in an empty universe, speaking to no one, unaware that the world is held aloft merely by my delusions”
“We do not have answers. I am not certain we even have questions.“
“Regret nothing, until it is too late. Then, regret everything.“
Published
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