writingonapples:

thepioden:

cycas:

theelvenkingshalls:

mistergandalf:

mistergandalf:

one of my favorite lotr facts is that gondorians speak sindarin as a first language and yet when faramir was talking to frodo and sam about cirith ungol he was like “we don’t know what’s in there.” like faramir. cirith ungol is sindarin for “pass of the spider.” do the math

some of my favorite tags on this post

Don’t forget that Frodo also speaks Sindarin, which makes this even worse.

Faramir: Hey, don’t go up the Spider Stairs.

Frodo: Why? What’s up the Spider Stairs?

Faramir: We don’t know, Frodo. We just don’t know.

But, to be fair, both of them live in a world where for seven thousand years people have been going around sticking names on things, so they automatically assume that all the names are out of date. 

Frodo’s local pub is called the Green Dragon.  His life has not prepared him for a situation where you go up the Spider Stairs and there really is a honking great big spider up there. 

#The house next door to mine is called ‘Cobwebs’#I don’t know why#but I don’t think it’s owned by arachnids

Assuming lack-of-spiders like this is exactly what got Frodo almost-eaten by Shelob. 

#I for one ALWAYS assume Spiders #and I have not once been attacked by a primordial spawn of ungoliant and then kidnapped by orcs #anyway if you don’t want to live your life in Spider-fueled paranoia like me for some reason #there’s a quick test you can do #is the NEXT house down owned by Sauron? If so this dramatically increases probability of Spiders – @thepioden

sufficientlylargen:

elethgreenleaf:

penny-anna:

If you find yourself in times of trouble, ask yourself, ‘what would Gandalf do’, and remember, ‘beat a man unconscious with a big stick’ is a valid answer

When I find myself in times of trouble,
Gandalf Greyhame comes to me,
Wailing on those assholes,
With a tree (with a tree)

elaneth-elf-friend:

space-ace:

celery, the elf dude: tell me where is gandalf for i much desire to speak with him

legolas, beautiful, the other elf dude: *tearing up* we mcfreakin lost him

I FOUND IT

theelvenkingshalls:

mistergandalf:

mistergandalf:

one of my favorite lotr facts is that gondorians speak sindarin as a first language and yet when faramir was talking to frodo and sam about cirith ungol he was like “we don’t know what’s in there.” like faramir. cirith ungol is sindarin for “pass of the spider.” do the math

some of my favorite tags on this post

Don’t forget that Frodo also speaks Sindarin, which makes this even worse.

Faramir: Hey, don’t go up the Spider Stairs.

Frodo: Why? What’s up the Spider Stairs?

Faramir: We don’t know, Frodo. We just don’t know.

nola-aiwe:

Gimli: Let’s play two truths and a lie!

Aragorn: Oh, I’ll go first!

Aragorn: I’m tall, my eyes are green, and I’m 87 years old.

Éowyn: Um, that’s the right idea, but it’s gotta be a bit more challenging for everyone-

Legolas: His eyes are blue.

Éowyn: ….

Éowyn: He’s how maNY YEARS OLD???

femmegimli:

oneringofkeys:

femmegimli:

merry and pippin are the type of fake friends who gush about you behind your back but when you talk to them in person they call you a little bitch boy and steal your food

#i know im op but boromir ghostwrote this through me 

merry and pippin: and THEN he showed us how to do this crazy move to disarm your enemies and it was SO cool because boromir is like the best at everthing and he’s really nice and funny too-

boromir, overhearing this: aw thanks guys!

m&p: …..

merry: Literally didn’t ask

pippin: who the fuck are you

Aragorn: WHo the fUCK says tennis rackets can’t be used for sword fighting
Saruman: I say “Get out of my way” all the time it’s my favourite thing to say
Galadriel: Do I want to graduate, or do I want to leave this school as a fucking legend?
Elrond: *cups hands around face* I WANT TO KILL MYSELF BUT NO ONE HERE IS WORTH DYING FOR
Pippin: I don’t have a clue what is going on here but I’m gonna roll with it.
Frodo: *visibly sobbing* please, please, I just want this to end, I just want to graduate, please, get me out, all of you suck,
Eowyn: I’m sorry teacher, I wasn’t staring into space, I was just rethinking my life choices
Legolas: *slams body into locker* *hyperventilating* hELP ME I THINK I’M GAY

dasha-through-the-snow:

Have I ever shown you guys these weird late 80s Soviet Lord Of The Rings illustrations?

They were made by Sergei Iukhimov, who’s virtually unknown otherwise.